Diary of a Demented Store Owner
Sunday, 13 April 2008
In Today- The Bullseye Earth Tote/Shopping Bag
Feel great about conserving our natural resources as you carry home your latest booty from Fantasy In Glass in this durable, reusable, Bullseye-branded Earth friendly shopping bag
We could tell you that these bags are stylish and fashionable. We could tell you that these bags are environmentally responsible. We could say that they are strong and big enough to carry all the stuff you might pick up at FIG. We might even remind you that we are the first and currently only source for these great looking bags, all in black and fashionably emblazened with the Bullseye Glass Company logo. But we're not built like that-
Mikey's Top 9 List of Why You Must Get A Bullseye Earth Tote:
1. As our ever attentive staff meticulously run each and every sale square we receive through our own in-house electro-Figtrometer to eliminate excess radiation and bad karma, this bag will shield you from radiated glass should you buy some elsewhere (one of the many steps we take to assure your safety and protection).
2. Get a piece of history- these were the bags that were originally used to transport the holes found in SwissCheesed GlassWerks’ glass
3. Mikey uses several to store all the cash he couldn't spend at our one and only Canadian wholesaler because they have no inventory
4. This is the bag that brought back the Toyofigus bone Mikey found in the Neander Valley
5. It will fit eight bottles of single malt scotch perfectly (are you listening Lani?)
6. It's not gold gilded so you'll never have to worry about seeing Donald Trump carrying one
7. You can stick it over Gary Brown's head so maybe he won't comment on this blog entry
8. They're the exact length of Bullseye Rodz!
9. It's small enough to carry one foot of each of the colours available from Spectrum for fusing and still have room for a Bullseye catalogue and a case of beer.
We're selling these Earth Tote bags at cost (Bullseye graciously agreed to sell them to us at a substantial discount) with a small markup that we will match and donate to David Suzuki so he can buy more gas for his diesel bus (kidding, boy- some of you environmentalists really need to lighten up). Actually, the World Wildlife Fund (WWF) is one of the best environmental organizations in handling their fundraising and supporting their causes and that's where we're sending a cheque. Thanks Bullseye and thank you!