Diary of a Demented Store Owner

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

Business Takeover Shocks Industry

Toronto, ON: It was announced today that Mikey Figgy of Fantasy In Glass (FIG) Glassworks has successfully completed a corporate takeover of Canada’s one and only Canadian Stained Glass Supplier (OOCSGS)! The move into wholesale supplier ownership was something in the planning stages for hours, and one that took deft planning and some financial wrangling.
In an interview with Gary Brown from the Financial News, Mikey revealed some of his plans for the future, “Yup, we got some big plans there coming up! I envision an industry full of love and cooperation. Where Birkenstocks are once again viewed as fashionable. One where everyone will learn to fuse using Bullseye. Where every purchase comes with a complimentary bottle of single malt scotch!”
He continued, “ As a matter of fact, I am so bullish on this industry that I plan to open a second wholesale supplier to compete with myself! Yes, it’s true, as I recognize that competition is important. That way I’ll have to worry about such things as stock outages to avoid the loss of sales to myself. And I’ll be forced to make sure my selection is large and varied enough that people don’t go to my competition, me. As a matter of fact, one of the first things I plan to do is to remove the U.S. dollar surcharge on Canadian goods to make myself more competitive with me.”


Unknown said...

Go Mikey, Go, Go Gooooo!

Anonymous said...

Yeah Mikey,...Go, Go and Gooooo!
Pat, you don't have to be such a kiss ass, we get it!
By the way will you be coming north at all? We are in Bracebridge, and a shorter drive for supplies would be welcoming. Huronia Art is great, don't get us wrong, but FIG has the variety we prefer. Besides, you're better looking too. (don't tell Gord)
Sexy Glass Ladies

FusedLight said...

Of course, this reporter's comments were not in any way affected (or is that effected?) by the Small and Insignificant "honourarium" (If it goes in your stomach, it's not a bribe - GCB's Dad {rip}) he received for the report.

GC Brown
(Go Mikey!)